Salty and Cara: ‘The Blue Dew’, Episodes 3 and 4
Love and crime in a world of fruit and vegetables … the story goes on (Halloween Double Feature)
Episode 3
Some inside-out views. And maybe a faint perspective ahead.
This was the last call. Courgette had had enough for the day. The phone had been ringing off the hook practically from the moment she walked into the small downtown office in the morning until now. And technically, she was already working overtime. But she had known her boss since he was a very small Cumberman and his father, who had hired her when she was still a young zucchini. She sighed.
“Cumberman & Cumberman Investigations. Good evening, how can I help you?”
“Yes, this is Dr. Bergamotte. Is Detective Cumberman there?”
‘No time for courtesy’, she thought, ‘this must be the doctor from the hospital that Salty has been trying to get hold of for three days.’ “I’m afraid Quentin Cumberman is not at his desk right now. Can he call you back?”
The odd silence said it all.
“Perhaps I can take a message for him?” volunteered Courgette.
The doctor fought his pride and finally said: “Okay, I will give you the information I have. I understand that it is very important to clear up unresolved issues. Since I need those to help my patient, I will waive my usual privacy policy. Do you have a pen?”
The old secretary smiled. These little games never changed: “Thank you, Professor, we really appreciate your help. Mr. Cumberman will be very happy to finally get some solid information on this case. All the other parties involved seem to have no interest in filling in the blanks.”
The doctor’s reaction was authentic for once: “Yes, I can imagine. This is a business deal gone bad. We are talking about ‘big’ business. It even has a little tomato smell to it.”
“Hm …,” she really needed to go home and get some rest, “so should I write ‘evidence of a professional chemistry lab indicating organized black market activity’? And maybe: ‘Artificial compound with no links to established nutritional fluids.’ “
“Yes, madam, that would be a very good way to put it.”
She sighed. So they really had no additional information at all.
But the doctor was not finished: “There is something very interesting about the substance we found in the fluids of this patient, as well as in all the other victims’ remains. The substance does not really dissolve. It basically stays the same. Something like a strong poison … or a very effective cleaning agent”.
This was new. “And is there anything else, Professor?” Now Courgette’s detective senses were awakened. You did not work half your life in one place without picking up some of the trade.
“Funny, you should ask. There is actually something else. I was not sure if it would help you, because I could not make anything out of it: The substance sort of resembles something I saw in the laboratory of the university many years ago.”
“Our university?” Now this was getting really solid. “What time frame are we talking about?”
“Back then, I was still an assistant professor, working for the head of the physiognomy department. It must have been when Detective Cumberman was still with the police.” There were voices in the background now. “But I’m afraid I have to leave you here. I must get back to my patients.”
Courgette had just finished her notes when Salty came through the door.
“Hello dear. I see you are you still at it. You are such a golden girl.”
She smiled. “Yes, you do like your golden girls. Don’t you?”
Salty laughed. He had known the nice lady at his reception and her family all his life. The families were good friends. He even met Cara through Courgette’s family. Her brother-in-law Murkus had worked as a gardener and then as the family’s boatman. And even now, when Murkus was retired, he was still somehow part of Cara’s family. Avery Mabola, Cara’s father, had just made sure the old zucchini had a decent retirement through a small fund when the family lost all their money in a mysterious embezzlement. But unlike the rest of the family, Courgette and her daughter Gitta had yellow skin. Like his beloved starfruit.
“So, before you take your well-deserved rest: Is there anything interesting we did not know?
“Yes, as a matter of fact there is: The doctor at the hospital just called. The deadly blue substance does not dissolve. Neither in Beta’s fluids nor in the remains of the victims. It reminded him of a strong poison. Or a cleaner. He also thinks he has seen something like it before. At our university, back in the days when you were still earning your master’s merits.”
“That’s news, isn’t…?” He did not get to finish his sentence because the door opened again. The frame was almost completely filled by a large rounded purple-black mass – Don Tomatoni’s lieutenant.
“Hey, Salty,” the henchman saw no point in being polite, “so how’s it going? Any news on that blue stuff yet?”
Salty picked up a large stack of papers from the desk next to him, deftly slipping his secretary’s notes into the pile.
“Hey, Aubergio, … no, unfortunately it seems like no one has seen or knows anything. Funny, isn’t it?”
The eggplant was motionless, his voice cold: “Well, that’s too bad. I mean, with all those fruits and vegetables turning to mush and everything. And now even the Major’s daughter … . Don Tomatoni is really worried, you know. He thinks maybe it’s some other gang from the next valley.”
Salty played along: “Oh yeah, I bet the Don is really upset. Looks like somebody’s picking his berries and feeding the Swallowtails, huh? Must be upsetting to have that kind of mess in your own backyard.”
The mobster had the ugliest smile Courgette had ever seen: “You know the game, Detective. So if anything comes up, you give me a ping. Just leave a note with your pretty little Miss Fruit at Hanano’s place and I’ll get back to you.”
Salty nodded and then went to his own office, which was separated from the reception by a large glass window.
“Oh yes, … Cumberman, one more thing: you might want to keep it to yourselves – you and your nice old secretary – that I was here. Don Tomatoni does not like attention. He just appreciates to be informed, you know.”
“I understand perfectly, Aubergio. Have a nice evening.”
She had packed up her bags and coat and was on her way out when the phone rang again.
Salty rushed out of his office: “No, dear, you go home now and please say hello to your family. I got this. See you tomorrow.”
He had already picked up the phone when his employee and trusted friend finally made it through the door.
“Cumberman & Cumberman Investigative Services. What can I do for you?”
“Detective Cumberman, is that you on the phone?”
Salty sighed: They would never get it. His father had been the real detective, a retired police officer who had fulfilled his dream and opened an insurance investigation bureau. He, the son, had a master’s degree in criminal investigation and law. But he was no detective.
“Yes, madam, I am. How is the mayor?”
The mayor’s secretary snorted: “He is holding up like a true city leader. It is quite admirable. And he wants to see you first thing in the morning. When the town hall opens.”
This was not unexpected, but Salty had to ask, “Is there anything else? Did he find out something new?”
“I’m not at liberty to say, Detective,” the pumpkin loved her job, you could tell, she always played the whole drama, “but I advise you to comply with the mayor’s request. Good day.”
He chuckled. No, there were probably no new facts. But he would have to check the next day.
The old secretary smiled. These little games never changed: “Thank you, Professor, we really appreciate your help. Mr. Cumberman will be very happy to finally get some solid information on this case. All the other parties involved seem to have no interest in filling in the blanks.”
The doctor’s reaction was authentic for once: “Yes, I can imagine. This is a business deal gone bad. We are talking about ‘big’ business. It even has a little tomato smell to it.”
(End of Episode 3)
Episode 4
The big fruits are getting involved. For better or for worse.
The town hall had that typical air about it. Definitiveness, authority and time. It had been there as long as the valley had been inhabited. Or so it seemed.
Salty liked the building. At least it had an architectural style that could be described. Unlike many of the other large structures around it. He was not late, but he still felt in a hurry. Things were finally about to pick up momentum.
The security guard – a huge pumpkin in a long uniform coat and official cap – greeted Salty. They had known each other for a long time. The officer had once been a colleague of his father’s, before he decided to trade the challenging and dangerous work outside for something more comfortable.
“How is your wife, Kad? Did your son graduate from university?”
“Sure he did,” the friendly, round figure beamed with pride, “the first pumpkin in the family with an academic education.”
“That’s a great thing.”
“Yes, you should know that yourself. You were also the first in your family to wear the big hat, right?”
The young cucumber smiled: “That’s right, officer, you still have your waterproof memory, I see. Say hello to your wife when you see her.”
The mayor’s office was on the top floor and had the best view in town.
The middle-aged apple did not look like he had gotten enough rest lately. His skin was dull and wrinkled.
“So, Detective, are there any new leads in the case? The Council and all the major families are upset, demanding results and the elimination of the threat as soon as possible.”
“What do the police have so far?
“Pfff,” the mayor obviously did not have much faith in his appointed guardians of law and order, “they are deciding whether to have a brew or a water before or after they file their report. That’s how much they’ve got so far!”
Salty wanted to give the city’s leader something to at least take the pressure off of him. He could not even imagine what the father, who had just lost his only offspring, must be going through right now.
The ironclad politician must have guessed what he was thinking, because his voice softened for a moment: “It’s okay, we’re dealing with it somehow, but I really need some answers. We are on the verge of a mass hysteria here.”
So the investigator gave him a brief summary of what his secretary had heard on the phone the day before. He only left out the part about the doctor remembering an earlier project at the university. He did not know what to make of it yet, and he did not want to lose the opportunity to go after the people behind the crime, nor did he want to set off a ‘scary bug hunt’.
The mayor looked firmly at the young gherkin, whose father he had known since his own early days: “Something else. Be careful. Seeing someone would risk upsetting the top families so easily could indicate that they have some roots there themselves. There could be some rotten apples up there, you know? I don’t know if I can protect you if someone wants to play Who-spoiled-the-Lot“.
Salty nodded, “I appreciate your honesty, Mayor, and I have no intention of getting into any sticky mess myself.” He stood and turned to leave.
“And Detective Cumberman…”, the mayor gave way to a small grin behind his sorrow, “please give my regards to your lovely girlfriend.”
Of course he knew, everybody knew. They did not say anything bad about it, because Salty’s father had been very popular and his mother was well known and liked as well. Unfortunately, that was not how Cara’s family handled the matter.
“I will, thank you, Mayor, and please give my condolences to your wife. I am very sorry for your loss.”
The mayor’s face did not move, but his eyes went deep and dark: “Thank you, Quentin, I really appreciate your kind words. I know you mean it.”
Salty thoughts were still deep in his mind as he left the town hall, so he did not react immediately when a large eggplant approached him. Then he realized that one of Don Tomatoni’s tough fruits was asking him in an impatient tone to accompany his boss to the boat that was waiting at the dock in front of the big public building. It was not Aubergio, but the crook was not much smaller, so there was no doubt that it would be wise to comply with the request.
He was only angry at himself for not having anticipated the incident. It was clear that the biggest crime leader would want to know what was going on … or at least what certain people knew about it.
The Don looked friendly as his guest entered the main cabin of his fast city yacht.
“I’m really sorry, Detective. You know, I don’t usually bother to do the walking myself, but this is a special situation.”
‘Yes, and I would really like to know why you are so interested in this case. Crimes are happening all the time, fruits and vegetables are being killed, and you don’t even bother to let some fresh air in,’ the investigator thought. This whole situation gave him a very strange feeling. And he did not like strange feelings. Still, he knew that this tomato was rolling bigger fruit than he was, so he went with it.
“Don Tomatoni, thank you for the invitation. I don’t think I’ve ever had the pleasure of being invited to your private yacht before.”
“Oh, it’s just a little boat to get places in and between the canals. The big one always gets stuck. Especially this time of day when everyone is trying to get places.”
“Yeah, I bet…”, funny that he mentioned the size of the boat. The racing boat, with its two decks above the waterline, was about three times the size of his office. But he had to be polite.
“You’re concerned, Detective, and I understand why. But my lieutenant told me that he visited you yesterday. It seemed to him that you might need some help with those horrible murders that have been going on around town lately. So I thought I might show you something. Aubergio insisted.”
Salty felt a little nauseous as the boat picked up speed. But it was too late to get off the planks.
The mayor looked firmly at the young gherkin, whose father he had known since his own early days: “Something else. Be careful. Seeing someone who would risk upsetting the top families so easily could indicate that they have some roots there themselves. There could be some rotten apples up there, you know? I don’t know if I can protect you if someone wants to play Who-spoiled-the-Lot“.
Salty nodded, “I appreciate your honesty, Mayor, and I have no intention of getting into any sticky mess myself.”
(End of Episode 4)
Side Notes:
Now that you have seen two different views of the city, let me give you a quick tour:
- What you see through the windows of Salty’s office and the Mayor’s office is part of ‘New Valley’. The main means of transportation are waterways. Rivers and canals that divide the inner part of the city. This is the traditional part, usually called ‘Oltown’. There live cucumbers and pumpkins who usually work in public service. Also some zucchini have their workshops with additional living quarters in this area, like most of the other handicrafts of the valley.
- On the left you can see ‘Ant Hill’. Those high constructions are the companies and some residential areas for the better off ants. They run labor leasing for other insects, such as boat rowers for taxis, message beatles or cleaner bugs. And they are responsible for the valley’s energy production – mainly photovoltaic and hydroelectric. They also produce the batteries needed to power larger machines and boats. The ants train the insects that work for them in short, on-the-job courses. The common insect workforce is paid in food and lives in an abandoned part of the city higher up, where a landslide has buried some of the buildings and structures. This place is commonly referred to as ‘The Slides’. Living there is literally the equivalent of living in the darkest slums of the city.
- The large oval structure by the river is not only the temple of Togrow (or ‘Uncle Tog’ as the fruitables call him) – the god of the soil in the fruitable society – but it also marks the entrance to the underground part of the city. It was built and is run by potatoes, who obviously prefer to stay in dark, dry and cool places. They are also involved in underground construction. They work with woodlice, which they breed and train themselves.
- Next to it you can see a row of white towers. They are part of the air conditioning system of Turnip Town. All the turnips, beets and radishes call this place home. They are a colorful bunch who mostly live at night. They often work the night shift on the taxi boats. Also they are the only inhabitants of the valley who wear body carvings. Unfortunately, this does not work for the red beet community, as they would just print patterns wherever they sit or lean. The people of Turnip Town typically do not wear hats like everyone else. As a matter of pride, they keep their greens short.
Some of the larger turnips and beets own nightclubs in Oltown. The most famous is called ‘Ourbach’s Cellar’ and is run, at least officially, by a family of beetroot – the Ourbachs. The whole place is basically black, purple, dark red, gold and glitter. And it is Don Tomatoni’s second favorite place to hang out. - On the right side of the picture – or in the background of the mayor’s view – are the wonderful ‘Gentle Slopes’. They are like the ‘Betterly Hills’ of the valley. All the rich fruits live there – at least the tree fruits – as well as some zucchini. The rich fruits of Gentle Slopes live in air-conditioned and light-filtered greenhouses. In the center of the greenhouse there is the traditional family shrine with the family tree – at room height maximum, as a well-groomed fruit tree usually is.
- Near the river, on the green slopes, there are public nurseries. These are the places where, by law, anyone who cannot afford their own gardener – a cross between a genetics expert, a midwife and a preschool teacher – must have their offspring raised. The typical gardener comes from the zucchini community, sometimes a cucumber will do the job, although they are more often employed in the education of young fruitables.
Those youngsters can later attend basic green schools, some specialized academies that prepare young citizens for public service and university. Although the University is basically reserved for the Tree Fruit – with very few highly talented exceptions from other parts of New Valley’s inhabitants. The crafters train their own workforce in a classic apprenticeship system. - One last landmark needs to be explained: The tower with the ball on top. It marks the top of the temple for Towata – or ‘Aunt Owa’, as the fruitables lovingly call their moody goddess of the water. The building is basically a water tower which runs a a beautiful scenery of fountains and cascades below.
Missed the last episode? Here it is [ I< ] And what happens next? Find out [ >I ]
You have no clue, what is going on at all? Here is how it all started: [‘Salty and Cara. The Crime Story‘]
Needless to say, the stories about Salty and Cara are pure figments of my imagination. No resemblance to any person or place – present or past – is intended. But I am sure you have already figured that out 😉